It seems like I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop when it comes to Lauren. I know, it's a little pessimistic, but I am just being honest. For the better part of her three years it seemed like things were popping up all the time that would shake my soul to the core. Things have been going good and I feel like I am posing for another blow. Like I am planting my feet and squaring my shoulders, ready for the next one, two punch.
I know it's on my mind because of a letter I got from Lauren's teacher. We need to meet for an IEP review for the summer. She qualifies to go to school as an ESY (Extended School Year) student and we need to get that ball rolling. It is a very quick and easy meeting. On the form Lauren's teacher sent home were two boxes checked off. It said that the purpose of the meeting was to discuss:
1) the extended school year
2) how to best meeting the special needs of your child
Pretty simple, right? Well, my brain started going into mini-panic mode. Did that second box mean that they are having trouble meeting her needs? Is she not doing as well as they hoped? Maybe they see something that we need to address. Deep down I know that they probably have to check that box for everyone. For me, it meant that my daughter has something else wrong that I missed and now we need to address it. Is that crazy? My biggest fear is that someone will discover that she has cognitive issues and she can't learn. I worry that she will struggle academically and physically. I feel like she deserves to not have to struggle in at least one area of her life. If she already has to work harder to run, jump, hear, and talk, then she shouldn't have to work harder to learn.
I know it's silly and I know that everything always turns out fine. I just need to know that she is perfect the way she is and worrying won't change a thing.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Never in my Life
Never in my life did I see a child act so horribly to a parent as I did at Lauren's bus stop on Tuesday. I am not sure if I can paint an accurate pictures using words, but it's worth a try. You are going to be appalled.
Lauren gets picked up and dropped off at a shopping center near my house. There are a lot of bus stops for a lot of different schools at the same location. All of the buses are about five minutes apart. Every day, I get to watch a load of kids get dropped off and scurry to their waiting automobiles. On Tuesday, a kid got off the bus and caught my eye. Although I couldn't hear anything, I knew he was arguing with his mom shortly after getting off the bus. The little boy was around five or six. No doubt he was a kindergartner. The mom was busy talking to a friend in the car next to hers. The boy was getting more and more agitated by the minute.
The next thing I knew, the boy started wailing on his mother with his lunchbox. Yes, hitting his mother repeatedly with his vinyl lunch box like he was fighting off the devil himself. He was hitting her so often and so hard that she fell backwards into the front seat of the car while blocking the blows with both hands crossed in front of her face. I wouldn't have believed it either if I hadn't had a front row seat to the mayhem.
The mom started to get up and I started saying a prayer for the kid. I was sure he was about to meet Jesus. Instead, the mom went back to talking to her friend laughing about the whole thing. That made the boy even more agitated. This six year old started off to the other end of the parking lot. He sat down on one of the islands and refused to come back to the car. The mom got in her car and drove off! She went around the parking lot and drove past to see if she could get him in the car. As he stood up and walked to the car, he wielded his lunchbox yet again. This time the front passenger side was his unsuspecting target. He got three good hits to the side of the car door before making his way to the backseat.
Just imagine what this kid gets away with at home. I am still amazed that it even happened. I wonder what I would have done if Lauren had tried that same stunt. Then I realized, Lauren never would. A kid learns their limits early in life. He apparently didn't have to worry about boundaries in his house. I would really love to be a fly on a wall sometimes.
Lauren gets picked up and dropped off at a shopping center near my house. There are a lot of bus stops for a lot of different schools at the same location. All of the buses are about five minutes apart. Every day, I get to watch a load of kids get dropped off and scurry to their waiting automobiles. On Tuesday, a kid got off the bus and caught my eye. Although I couldn't hear anything, I knew he was arguing with his mom shortly after getting off the bus. The little boy was around five or six. No doubt he was a kindergartner. The mom was busy talking to a friend in the car next to hers. The boy was getting more and more agitated by the minute.
The next thing I knew, the boy started wailing on his mother with his lunchbox. Yes, hitting his mother repeatedly with his vinyl lunch box like he was fighting off the devil himself. He was hitting her so often and so hard that she fell backwards into the front seat of the car while blocking the blows with both hands crossed in front of her face. I wouldn't have believed it either if I hadn't had a front row seat to the mayhem.
The mom started to get up and I started saying a prayer for the kid. I was sure he was about to meet Jesus. Instead, the mom went back to talking to her friend laughing about the whole thing. That made the boy even more agitated. This six year old started off to the other end of the parking lot. He sat down on one of the islands and refused to come back to the car. The mom got in her car and drove off! She went around the parking lot and drove past to see if she could get him in the car. As he stood up and walked to the car, he wielded his lunchbox yet again. This time the front passenger side was his unsuspecting target. He got three good hits to the side of the car door before making his way to the backseat.
Just imagine what this kid gets away with at home. I am still amazed that it even happened. I wonder what I would have done if Lauren had tried that same stunt. Then I realized, Lauren never would. A kid learns their limits early in life. He apparently didn't have to worry about boundaries in his house. I would really love to be a fly on a wall sometimes.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Get in Shape Girl
I got sick of not doing anything about my weight. I am about to go up a pant size and I refuse. I was asked to sing in my brother-in-law's wedding and I will not stand up there feeling yucky about myself.
So I decided to quit complaining and start doing.
I went to www.calorie-count.com and decided to do a low calorie diet. On Calorie-count.com you type in you gender, age, height, current weight, goal weight, and when you want to hit your goal weight. The website tells you how many calories you should comsume a day in order to reach you target weight. According to the website, I will meet my target weight by September, 2008.
I know what your thinking. That has got to be hard. No, not yet. I've been doing this for two weeks now and I don't feel hungry. I have a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios with skim milk for breakfast. I eat an apple for a snack. I have a turkey sandwich or a cheese tortilla for lunch. I eat chicken and french fries for dinner. I even have enough calories left to have a piece of chocolate cake for dessert. Today, I had a serving of Cheedar Cheese Combos as a snack. I am still waiting for this to get tough.
The secret is the portions. I measure out my cereal and my milk according to the serving size on the back of the box. I measure everything I eat and write it down in a little notebook. That way I can see how many calories I have eaten and make sure I don't go over. It has turned into a game for me. Each day I try to find different things I can eat and still have calories left over. I don't have to buy food from a program. I don't have to pay for meetings. I just eat the proper amount of good food and keep track of it all.
I know that I still need to exercise and do some hard work to meet my goal. I'm not trying to do something for nothing. It just makes it a little easier to do it all when I have a plan in place to help.
Disclaimer: Of course I am no expert. Always consult a doctor before trying any diet program.
So I decided to quit complaining and start doing.
I went to www.calorie-count.com and decided to do a low calorie diet. On Calorie-count.com you type in you gender, age, height, current weight, goal weight, and when you want to hit your goal weight. The website tells you how many calories you should comsume a day in order to reach you target weight. According to the website, I will meet my target weight by September, 2008.
I know what your thinking. That has got to be hard. No, not yet. I've been doing this for two weeks now and I don't feel hungry. I have a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios with skim milk for breakfast. I eat an apple for a snack. I have a turkey sandwich or a cheese tortilla for lunch. I eat chicken and french fries for dinner. I even have enough calories left to have a piece of chocolate cake for dessert. Today, I had a serving of Cheedar Cheese Combos as a snack. I am still waiting for this to get tough.
The secret is the portions. I measure out my cereal and my milk according to the serving size on the back of the box. I measure everything I eat and write it down in a little notebook. That way I can see how many calories I have eaten and make sure I don't go over. It has turned into a game for me. Each day I try to find different things I can eat and still have calories left over. I don't have to buy food from a program. I don't have to pay for meetings. I just eat the proper amount of good food and keep track of it all.
I know that I still need to exercise and do some hard work to meet my goal. I'm not trying to do something for nothing. It just makes it a little easier to do it all when I have a plan in place to help.
Disclaimer: Of course I am no expert. Always consult a doctor before trying any diet program.
Friday, January 11, 2008
Bossy
My sweet, precious angel is turning into a bossy little girl. I never even saw it coming. I know that I want her to be independent, but good grief. As the language increases, so does her desire to control the environment around her. Perfect example. Lauren has decided that she needs to be the line leader...at home. Wouldn't be so bad, but it's just me and her. Not much of a line, however, she still wants me to follow her wherever we go in the house. She scrunches her nose, furrows her eyebrows, and says 'back' while pointing to her back. At first I thought there was something hurting her back. Nope. She was telling me to get behind her as she trotted off to wherever we had to go. Sometimes she will walk with her hands clasped behind her back like she's walking through an art museum. It's hilarious to watch! She even runs in front of Ty and I walking in from the car just so she can be first to the door and open it by herself.
I'm just going to apologize in advance to her teacher at preschool and the volunteers at church. I can only imagine how bad she will want to be first in line when there's more than just me.
I'm just going to apologize in advance to her teacher at preschool and the volunteers at church. I can only imagine how bad she will want to be first in line when there's more than just me.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
The Bus
Lauren rode the bus for the first time Tuesday. Well, sort of. We went to the theater where her bus stop was and waited like two nervous parents sending their child off to college for the first time. I felt the lump in my throat grow as the bus pulled closer. We waited at the back of the line to let all the kids get on first since it would take us a few extra minutes to buckle her into the car seat.
When it was time for Lauren to get on, she grabbed the handle of the bus and climbed the stairs like a pro. She turned the corner, walked down the aisle and sat down in the first empty seat. She got on that bus like she had been doing this for years. Not a wimper or a cry came out of that girl. She was ready to go.
Ty looked around and there was no star seat on the bus. We were on the wrong bus. To our suprise, there are 3 or 4 different schools that use the same place as a bus stop. Who knew? She was on the bus to Barringer. We got her off just in time to see her bus pull away. So I drove her to school.
She did get to ride the bus home Tuesday and had a great time. Everytime a bus drives by Lauren says "Lauren bus!" I don't think we will have a problem with her adjusting to the ride to school. I, on the otherhand, still can't believe that someone so small has to ride something so big. Maybe I just need more time to adjust.
When it was time for Lauren to get on, she grabbed the handle of the bus and climbed the stairs like a pro. She turned the corner, walked down the aisle and sat down in the first empty seat. She got on that bus like she had been doing this for years. Not a wimper or a cry came out of that girl. She was ready to go.
Ty looked around and there was no star seat on the bus. We were on the wrong bus. To our suprise, there are 3 or 4 different schools that use the same place as a bus stop. Who knew? She was on the bus to Barringer. We got her off just in time to see her bus pull away. So I drove her to school.
She did get to ride the bus home Tuesday and had a great time. Everytime a bus drives by Lauren says "Lauren bus!" I don't think we will have a problem with her adjusting to the ride to school. I, on the otherhand, still can't believe that someone so small has to ride something so big. Maybe I just need more time to adjust.
Monday, January 7, 2008
Sorry
I know, I suck. I haven't written a thing for a long time. My bad. I have now unpacked everything, organized new toys, threw away any toy that was missing pieces or totally disgusting, put away all Christmas gifts, and went grocery shopping. Life seems to be back to normal. I figured it was a good time to recap the high's and low's of the trip to PA. Try to contain your excitement.
High:
We slept in the most comfortable bed at my mom's house. It was like sleeping on a cloud.
Low:
Our bed feels like a lumpy, sagging, pile of oats.
High:
We went sled riding and saw it snow for two days. We had a total of 7 inches.
Low:
Our car is covered in salt and soot. My toes are permanently frozen. I hated putting on 8 layers of clothes just so you could go to the car without suffering hypothermia. Cold, northern weather makes me grumpy.
High:
Lauren had plenty of practice climbing stairs at her cousins' house.
Low:
Lauren fell down the stairs three times in one night. My heart literally stopped for a few seconds each time it happened. She's quick and sneaky. She would wait until no one was looking and slide down head first. Is that instinctive? Luckily, she was near the bottom each time it happened.
High:
Lauren got to visit her great-grandma at the assisted living home.
Low:
Lauren ran down the halls full speed, laughing as if someone was tickling her with a feather as she sprinted along. At one point, she actually crawled under the walker of a little old lady that stopped to talk to us. Poor Eleanor, she had no idea what she was getting herself into when she stopped to say hi to the cute little girl in the hall.
I will try to be better and blog more often. Thanks for being patient!
High:
We slept in the most comfortable bed at my mom's house. It was like sleeping on a cloud.
Low:
Our bed feels like a lumpy, sagging, pile of oats.
High:
We went sled riding and saw it snow for two days. We had a total of 7 inches.
Low:
Our car is covered in salt and soot. My toes are permanently frozen. I hated putting on 8 layers of clothes just so you could go to the car without suffering hypothermia. Cold, northern weather makes me grumpy.
High:
Lauren had plenty of practice climbing stairs at her cousins' house.
Low:
Lauren fell down the stairs three times in one night. My heart literally stopped for a few seconds each time it happened. She's quick and sneaky. She would wait until no one was looking and slide down head first. Is that instinctive? Luckily, she was near the bottom each time it happened.
High:
Lauren got to visit her great-grandma at the assisted living home.
Low:
Lauren ran down the halls full speed, laughing as if someone was tickling her with a feather as she sprinted along. At one point, she actually crawled under the walker of a little old lady that stopped to talk to us. Poor Eleanor, she had no idea what she was getting herself into when she stopped to say hi to the cute little girl in the hall.
I will try to be better and blog more often. Thanks for being patient!
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Let it Snow
Finally, I got to play in the snow. This is one of the reasons I am sad that I don't live in PA anymore. We took Lauren out with her cousins and did some sled riding down the hill next to the house. Everyone else was prepared with snow pants and boots. Can you tell we are from NC? I had to beg, borrow, and steal pants, hats, and gloves. She rode down and trudged up the hill like she has been doing it for years. We had a blast!
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